As women, it’s no question that we wear different hats: professional, student, girlfriend, wife, mother, daughter, friend, sister, superwoman. And often times we may know how to care for everyone but ourselves. So when things get overwhelming, how do we handle it all? How do you face the world, when it seems like the world has you down? Whether it’s a family or relationship issue, or any personal struggle, it may be hard to face day-to-day life when we’re feeling down. Here are steps on how to get through your struggles while managing your career, family, social and love life. So that “even when you’re a mess you can still put on a vest with an ‘S’ on your chest.”
Make Up Your Mind – A lot problems start with “dis-ease” of the mind. If you’re going through a struggle make your mind up that you’re going to be okay. Our thoughts are very powerful, so think good ones. Say to yourself, “I’m going through a trial right now, but I know everything will work out for the better.” It may sound cliché, but what doesn’t kill really does make you stronger. Look at your situation as a chance to grow or make some necessary changes. With a positive outlook you’ll be ready to make the decisions to overcome the challenge.
Talk to Him/Her – Whatever your religion, spiritual connection or lack thereof, if you believe in a power higher than yourself prayer and meditation can definitely get you through a situation when things seem out of your hands. Take 5-10 minutes to yourself each day and block out the world to meditate or seek spiritual refuge. Be sincere in this and you never know how great the results may be. As the saying goes, “When prayers go up, blessings come down.”
Time Out – If everything and everyone is stressing you out, it may be time to get away. It can be something as small as powering off your phone for the day and going to your favorite park or a café. Or taking a weekend excursion for some peace of mind. Don’t be afraid of solitude. And, don’t be afraid to “get ghost” on a few folks temporarily either. Sometimes it can be a good thing. Getting away from a stressful environment can rejuvenate you and help you see things from a different perspective.
Don’t Over-Share – As much as people may ask you, “How are you doing?” or “How is everything?” it’s best to only share serious issues with close friends and family. For example, spilling your heart out to a co-worker about how the love of your life cheated on you is probably not a good idea. Nor is discussing a personal issue at your place of work or around individuals whom you don’t know very well. There’s nothing wrong with getting advice, but be sure to seek it from those you believe can really help you. Not someone who is just lending an ear for the time being.
Seek the Right Advice – A wise woman knows she doesn’t know everything. And you know your limits. Sometimes when things feel like they’re out of our hands, they are. As much as we may try to work things out on our own, we don’t have all the answers. But it may not be wise to spill all the beans to someone who can’t help you clean them up. If it’s a relationship issue, rather than seeking counsel from single girlfriends, it may be better to get advice from a couple who has been together or married for a while. They may have gone through and survived a similar situation. If it’s a serious health issue, don’t be scared to look for people who have overcome the same battle. You don’t have to suffer in silence or alone. There are an immense amount of support groups for various health-related and personal issues, so why not take advantage of them.
Know the Issue(s) – Before you can even attempt to solve an issue, you have to know what it is. What is bothering you? Why are things going wrong? What is the cause of the problem? Sometimes we could be feeling some type of way and not even know why. Think about what’s triggering your emotions or stress. Before you rush to blame others, look within and make sure you’re not letting your own shortcomings get the best of you. If the problem is coming from another source try to identify exactly what it is and then address it. Whether its family or friends, work related or financial strains, remember there’s always an answer; no matter how bleak things seem.
Woman Up – You’ve cried. You’ve sought advice. You’ve prayed. You may have even cut off all your hair. Now it’s time to face the issues head on. Don’t harbor negative feelings, procrastinate or sweep things under the rug. Make a plan of attack and get on it. If you feel you need to make a big change (move, go back to school, career change) start checking off that to-do list ASAP. If your significant other did something to hurt you, communicate that. If you feel like a co-worker or superior has disrespected you or treated you inappropriately, look into your company’s protocol and figure out the best way to address it. Or if you’re grieving the loss of a loved one and need time alone, express that to those around you. Whatever the case may be get on it. Know and believe you’re woman enough to handle it.