My high school boyfriend could not fathom the idea of eating nana. It was like a social death sentence.

“That’s just … ugh, nasty,” he complained.

“But I should give it freely, right?”

Here’s the truth. We both knew that our friends were doing it, but it wasn’t cool to talk about giving, just receiving. I knew that he wanted head more than I did, so the ball was in my court.

“I’m not giving, unless I’m receiving.”

“Arielle, just think. You don’t have to put your face in a vagina. I actually have to swallow your juices. You don’t have to swallow mine. It’s different.”

He must’ve not heard me.

“I’m not giving unless I’m receiving.”

He caved.

Good sex is about selfless reciprocation. After high school, there’s no reason for men to ask women for head and refuse to give it. It’s immature, sexually limiting, and frankly, selfish to expect a favor without giving one.

At this age, most men and women get it, at least in my circle. It’s very rare that I encounter a dude that doesn’t eat box. Most are eager, some are indifferent, but rarely do I hear “that’s just not my thing.” Apart from my high school boyfriend, I’ve never had to request oral sex from a partner. Most men have figured out the secret. If you eat box and do it well, you’ll get some (just about) every time. Spread a woman eagle and put your tongue to work. Most women will be ready to mount you (and return the favor).

However, I do have a good (dumb) friend that refuses to eat box. He’s a great guy, well educated, and women fawn over him. But how he holds down a girlfriend, I just don’t know, particularly since he enjoys getting head.

“Don’t these girls want you to return the favor?”

“Sometimes yes, but I always point out that it’s unnecessary. I make sure that she gets hers in other ways.”

That’s some manipulating shit. I’m laughing at this point because his confidence is amusing.

“You have to know that dick can’t replace oral; two completely different types of orgasms. You must know this. Or maybe you wouldn’t.”

“Seriously, Ari, I’ve never had a woman complain.”

It’d be one thing if he only dated women that weren’t into oral sex. I get it; some women don’t like to have their box eaten. Fine. But those women are far and few between, so how is this man surviving?

I’d hope that oral-desiring women wouldn’t settle for a man that refuses to reciprocate and vice versa. It’s only a recipe for failure. Wouldn’t you agree?

Do you mind giving head and never receiving? Speak on it.

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