2012 just began and this year, I’m aiming to try some new things. While I dipped my toe into the online dating world last year, I figured I’d give it another shot this year. While I don’t think I’ll meet my future husband, at the very least I’ll expand my social circle, hopefully have some fun, and have some interesting stories to write about.
Last night I was polishing up my profile on a dating site when I noticed a few things that kinda suck:
There aren’t enough black men: I know, some people think black women should expand our dating prospects. And while I agree with not limiting yourself, I have a major soft spot for the brothas (sue me). I mentioned this to a friend and she wondered if, perhaps, black men had too many options already and didn’t need to “resort” to online dating. That stung…was I “resorting” or was I just broadening the field? Hmmmm.
There aren’t enough black men who want to date black women: On the off chance that I have run across a black dude on a dating site (in my local area & age group), I notice that he’ll hint at wanting to date “others.” Usually this can be sussed out by his use of phrases like, “I’m not the average black guy,” or “I like ‘exotic’ women,” or “Unlike other black people, I like rock music.” While there’s nothing wrong with rock (I listen on occasion), having to specific that you’re not like OTHER “normal” (read: stereotypical) black people tells me you’re probably uncomfortable with your race and you looking for Becky.
Luring me in with freebies, only to hit me up for cash when I try to reach out: Man, listen. Most dating sites aren’t free…and I get that, but why do they try to trick you into thinking they are? Most sites allow you to sign up for free, browse profiles, and even make contact with people you find interesting, only to snatch it all away the moment you want to read what somebody wrote to you. Once that happens they start trying to hold your credit card info hostage. It’s like a crack dealer giving you the bomb free samples, then charging you for the weak ish once you’re hooked. Just give me the price up front.
Have you tried online dating sites? What are some things that you think suck?