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So last night like many of you I was laid out enjoying a night of mindless reality television before I had to return to work and what better way to veg out than by watching VH1’s Love & Hip Hop. As you already know, Jim Jones finally proposed to his long suffering girlfriend Chrissy Lampkin at the end of the episode…..or did he? Now correct me if I’m wrong but what he did was show up in Miami unannounced, get cursed out a bit, then shove a box and ring in her face while asking her to marry him.

We’ll just ignore the fact that they were technically already engaged because she proposed first. We’ll also ignore the fact that the ring may have simply been what Chrissy refers to as a “painkiller” since what Jim really wanted was peace and what she was really doing was brow beating him into marriage. But I digress.

Anyway, through the tears, Chrissy, box in hand, took a seat, took her ring out of the box and asked Jim to put the ring on her finger. Voila! Proposed to and engaged. But hol’ up, hol’ up, somethin’ ain’t right! In my Martin voice. What happened to the down on one knee part? You mean to tell me after 7 years and all that foolishness, not only did he not get down on one knee, but he had to be told to ring her and the whole ‘proposal’ was really him shoving a box at her like “Here, take that.” That can’t be life?

Maybe it’s just me, but when I envision a marriage proposal I see a man so overcome with love that he, on bended knee, professes his love for his lady and asks her to spend the rest of her life by his side. Now mind you, I completely get that Jim Jones isn’t exactly the mushy type, but can a sista get a knee bend after 7 years?? Even if he got on his knee and said “Yo, Chris, I know I be putting you through some ish, and I know you sick of me and want us to settle down and you know I agree. You been riding with me mad long and I ain’t never gonna find a lady that’ll hold me down like you, so yo, let’s do this marriage thing. Ya heard me!,” that would still be better than him just standing there and shoving a box in her face.

But then again, does how he proposed really matter? When it comes to marriage so many of us get caught up in the fairytale of it all. We want the prince, the horses, the romantic evening we can gush about to our family and friends later on. However, even when we get that fairytale, the reality of marriage ends up being far from a happily ever after. So what Chrissy didn’t get a candlelit, flower filled, on one knee proposal. He still surprised her…and he still proposed. How he did it shouldn’t be the barometer for how much he loves her or whether or not the proposal was sincere. Some folks get the fairytale and end up divorced before the ink on the papers can dry….Kim Kardashian anyone? In the end all that really matters is that Chrissy got what she wanted, a lifetime with the man of her dreams and whether it cam on bended knee or not, it was a fairytale to her.

What did you think of Jim Jones’ proposal? Would you have said yes?

– Danielle Pointdujour

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  • Jessica Mercedes

    Of course it matters!! It matters to them. And those are the only 2 people that it needs to matter to. She might have found that romantic. He surprised her in MIami right when she was having an emotional moment, pretended to be mad to throw her off, and popped the question that Chrissy thought she was never going to hear from him. It made me shed a tear. Only thing we need to worry about is how our men propose to us. Chrissy and Jim seem to be doing very well, even when they have their little spats.

  • Lets’s be clear…Jim and Chrissy were not engaged because she proposed. His response was “I got you” not I want to marry you, or even a yes. So…I cannot be anything but mortified when I review all the references to earning and deserving a ring. No one “owes” another person a marriage…this isn’t what marriage is about. I would encourage any woman to recognize that if a man can ask for your time, your love, or your a** then he can also ask for your hand. This proposal will encourage many women to take control and propose to their man, but if he wanted to marry you…please note that he would’ve asked…FIRST!

    (Steps off soapbox.)

  • Kristen

    Please get yourselves some business…as long as it was good enough for Chrissy, it was good enough…and that down on bended knee is so played out…I pray my husband to be comes up with something a little more creative than that. I loved it…I thought it was cute and very Jim and Chrissy…and the ring is beautiful…leave ’em alone.