When it comes to topics on the ‘taboo’ list, masturbation is usually somewhere near the top. Whether it’s from fear of religious consequences, shame or guilt, people are generally uncomfortable talking about the art of self pleasure and often deny doing it. The act itself is often attached to stigmas and negative feelings. Some people have even gone as far as to say it causes mental illness, but as more people become comfortable with their sexuality and talking openly about sex, the positives of masturbation are coming to light. According to a Planned Parenthood article, regular acts of self pleasure can reduce stress, provide a sexual outlet for people with out partners (which of course can help limit casual sex and the spread of diseases), induce sleep, strengthen pelvic muscle tone and even promote higher self esteem.

When I was younger I always thought masturbation was a dirty little secret that would keep me out of heaven one day, but as I matured and grew into my sexuality I found that it was something to be embraced not hidden.  I’ll talk about masturbation and sex in general, with anyone who wants to discuss it, a little trait I got from my fabulous aunt.  But unfortunately I know way too many grown women who can’t even talk about masturbation let alone admit that they do it.  Even as adults many of them consciously or subconsciously carry the guilt or shame of masturbation.  I always hear resounding “Ewww” or “I don’t need that, that’s what men are for” whenever I bring up the topic, and even some women I know for a fact have at least one vibrator will flat out deny partaking in a little self pleasure.  But why?

Personally, I see nothing wrong with a little self love from time to time and I keep a goodie box within close range of my bed to ensure that I get that QT time in with myself whenever the mood strikes.  Not only do I think it’s normal and nothing to be ashamed or feel guilty about, I think it’s a healthy way to get to know your own body (for sexual and health reasons) and definitely think it’s a healthy way to build a healthy sexual relationship with one’s significant other. I mean, if you don’t know what you like…how can you tell someone else, right?

So ladies are you ashamed to admit you masturbate? If so, have you gotten past it?  What are some stigmas you’ve heard about masturbation?


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  • OSHH

    Per the article ladies first yesterday, I just feel some things ladies do not discuss in public forums or with folk they are not intimate with.
    This site is contradictory and all over the place at times.
    That’s why is important to know thyself!

    • iQgraphics

      if you don’t contradict yourself from time to time, you have nothing to learn
      if you have nothing to learn, you are not alive.

      I think it’s okay to share things you have no problem with defending.

    • OSHH

      Yeah IQ life is definitetly for learning and through our experiences we learn more and more about ourselves. Some things we find we like, others not so much, but each day is a gift and a chance to get it right. That much I can agree with.

  • jamesfrmphilly

    i am not ashamed to admit that you masturbate…….

  • November Rain

    I masturbate…I have no shame. It get’s a little boring sometimes because there’s nothing like having another body in bed with you but, rather than put up with all the b.s. that comes my way, I’ll pleasure myself whenever I want, without shame. Can’t nobody love me like me.

  • 2NatuRho

    Loved this! Been masturbating since I was about 15 (in which I waited to have sex till I was 18 and out my parents house!) and now that am I in my adult years I’ve learned to appreciate it even more. I like to think I have an extremely high sex drive and because Im also celibate right now, masturbating cures that fix….so I always show myself love ;)

  • I’m not afraid to admit that I do it. It’s natural and a great stress reliever. It’s not something I walk around telling anyone, but if I was ever asked I’d be honest. I’m in a happy, healthy and sexual relationship, yet I still please myself per my individual sexuality often. Tomato Toe-mah-to.