From Frugivore — Parroting the oft-told axiom that men find strong women frightening, a personal trainer at the Y today said of Gym Buddy Allison and I: “Those girls scare me.”
My first reaction was, “Us? Scary??” We’re about as scary as the Hamburgler. (Seriously, Ronald McDonald is scary. But if I met the Hamburgler in a dark alley? You know it’d start with “Gimme your wallet” and end with fist bumps and “Just messin’ with you, man!”) Perhaps the trainer was afraid we’d do something stupid and make quadriplegics out of ourselves and sue the Y. But I’m pretty sure that all-encompassing liability waiver we signed when we got our memberships prevents us from ever living that dream. Besides, while we try lots of different things, we don’t do anything terribly risky. The worst we’re in danger of is some wicked bruises, a rolled ankle, or possibly a pulled ab muscle from laughing too hard.
My second reaction was to puff out my chest and growl, “He should be scared, by golly! We could kick his butt!” And then I realized that anyone who says “by golly” – even in their imagination – is inherently not scary. Plus, I like to talk big (and kiss my biceps when no one’s looking), but I really have no idea how to handle myself in a fight. In a showdown, I’m sure I’d be the one eating mat. Allison and I can’t even play basketball without apologizing every two minutes and saying, “No really, you take another shot. I had the ball last time!” It’s kinda pathetic, actually.