I’m the oldest in my family so I’ve always felt responsible for everyone in my family. I would feel compelled to give them advice on everything from health to relationships to career. It came from a good place because I want the best for my siblings and am used to them coming to me for direction, at least when they were younger. But as they grew older and became more independent, I realized my opinion wasn’t always needed or wanted. And my nagging wasn’t helping but actually annoying them and pushing them away.
Now, that I’m in a loving relationship, I try not to diminish our time together by nagging my man about the little things. If I’m asked for advice, I’m always willing to share — and for the big issues, I do speak up — but comments about him not getting enough sleep or needing to eat better? I keep those to myself. The reality is he’s probably well aware of them, and doesn’t need to hear it repeatedly from me.
Mrs. Michelle Obama takes a similar approach when dealing with her opinion on issues with husband President Barack Obama. She talks about it tonight on Part I of her interview with ABC’s “Nightline” airing at 11:35PM EST:
“In a job like this, the last thing the president of the United States needs when he walks in the door to come home is someone drilling him and questioning him about the decisions and choices that he’s made. There are definitely times when I may feel something, but I’ll hold back because I know he’ll either get to that on his own or it’s just not time.”
I totally agree. There’s something to be said for having peace on your home and knowing the right time to speak up or just fall back and let your partner come to a realization on their own terms.