Screen Shot 2014-09-23 at 1.56.22 PMYesterday afternoon I received a text message from a friend inquiring about advice for a friend. Apparently, her friend’s boyfriend of seven years lied about paying the rent for the last five, almost six, months. Though she inquired about bills and other mail, he assured her everything was taken care of. In actuality, everything wasn’t — and he had been hiding everything from her.

Following an eviction notice, she (the girlfriend) went inside the closet to move some of his clothes and that’s where she found the gas bill, Comcast bill, etc.

Instead of paying the rent, he was using the money she gave him to purchase the money order as his monthly personal allowance.

The first question I asked was, “Why?”

My friend responded, “she would always give him her half of the rent because she got paid first.” She continued, “she trusted that he was purchasing the money order like any normal boyfriend would do.”

Personally, there are a few things that without a doubt are grounds for a break up and this is at the top of my list. Though I feel sympathy for the young woman (and I really do), I also think she is slightly responsible for not keeping track of bills (and rent) herself.

More importantly, in my opinion, this shows:

  • This man cannot be trusted
  • He is financially irresponsible
  • Doesn’t care about her safety or well-being or he would have paid the bills to avoid being evicted

In addition, it was also confirmed at some point there was another woman in her house. Who knows what else has transpired without her knowledge.

What’s your take Clutchettes? What should she do?

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  • Dump him. Move on and consider this a lesson learned. He’s not her husband and he needs help.

  • ALM

    What am I missing? The bills were half paid for 5 or 6 months, and she is just now getting an eviction notice?

    Wouldn’t she normally get an eviction notice on the first or second month of underpaid rent?

  • RaiseTheBar

    “What should she do?”

    For me this isn’t a question regarding female/male relationships, but a question of FINANCES. A family member found himself in a similar financial situation with his spouse and foreclosure.

    The very first thing I would do is gather together all the bills and KNOW the total amounts due. Then I would start calling the bill collectors and advise them of my circumstances, then negotiate a payment plan. If I intend to stay in that residence I would change the locks and get a roommate to help with the expenses. If I do not intend to stay, I’d become someone else’s roommate, move back home with parents if possible or move in with other family members or friends until I got my finances in order.

  • Primmest Plum

    He lied about paying RENT. Not about buying eggs, or milk or getting toile paper–but rent. Really? This man doesn’t have his priorities straight. Unless, he’d secured a new place to live months before hand and just didn’t care about what happened to his current place…

    But 6 months? Something’s not right here. How daft must you be to underpay rent for almost 6 months and not at LEAST get a call from the landlord? Unless, he was intercepting them…

    This just reals of financial illiteracy on both parts.

    …and yeah. Dump him and sue him if you can to get your money back since it obviously wasn’t going to rent.

  • Me

    girl dump him and move back home with your parents. they didn’t finish teaching you how to be an adult. just cuz they say a man is supposed to provide for the household don’t mean you blindly hand your money to a man you ain’t married to. too bad you decided to learn if he was marriage material thru trial and error instead of just dating and observing his habits before shacking up. learn how to handle your own money before you go outsourcing the job. that’s how you know how to spot a problem within days instead of months.