Feature

Let’s Talk About Pep Sheds A New Light on Black Dating

Monday Feb 8, 2010 – By Latoya Peterson

After the deluge of articles focusing on why black women can’t date, get married or find decent men in the dating pool, is it nice to be able to watch four black women presented as being single and attractive.

That’s probably the main reason I keep tuning into VH1’s Let’s Talk About Pep, Sandy “Pepa” Denton’s latest foray into the world of reality television. Let’s Talk About Pep focuses on the dating lives of Pepa and three of her friends: Joumana Kidd, Jacque Reid, and Kali “Kittie” Troy. Joumana Kidd, a sports journalist and former model, is newly divorced from NBA star Jason Kidd, amid allegations of domestic abuse. Jacque Reid, a newscaster most famous for anchoring BET Nightly News, joins the cast as a woman ready for both a relationship and a child – but not necessarily in that order. And Kittie Troy – formerly the voice of Cita, the animated host of a music video countdown – brings a reckless sexuality to the cast.

The four women frequently meet in a restaurant to recap their adventures (and misadventures) in the world of dating. LTAP has only been on for four episodes, yet the women have already discussed sex, dating younger men, foot fetishists, purely sexual relationships, phone sex, internet lovers, speed dating, approaching men, meet and greets and everything in between. Jacque Reid is the quintessential reporter, often appearing to interrogate many of her dates – as well as asking pointed questions about sperm count and personal goals within the first few minutes of meeting. And Kittie’s risque escapades feature activities like using a stripper pole and having her toes sucked in a limousine.

The show is also remarkable for it’s challenge of common stereotypes. In some ways, it is liberating to see a group of black women in their 30s and 40s still seen as desirable partners for a variety of men. While Pep nervously mentions that she hasn’t been on the dating market in a long time (and she’s been celibate for the last four years), she and her friends still entertain a broad cross section of men hoping to make a love connection. Pep and her friends break stereotypes in other ways as well – as if in direct opposition to the stereotype that black women are “too picky” to acknowledge good men, Pep, Kittie, and Jacque place their romantic affections on whoever catches their fancy. In Kittie’s case, this included a shirtless man who answered to “Animal,” riding on the back of a trash truck in the wee hours of the evening.

The subject of interracial dating was also breached with Pep’s love interest named Tom. An Asian-American chef, Tom was one of the few men in the series to seriously leave a lasting impression on the shy Pep, and provide a few scenes of true heat and chemistry. By using a blindfold, strategically placed chocolate, and a sexy assumed confidence in the kitchen, Pep joked about her “Asian Persuasion” but it was clear there was all kind of heat in that kitchen.

The show is intended to be fun and fluffy, but one weak spot in the show is the glaring absence of Pep’s children. She has two children (a son, Tyran, and a daughter, Egypt) who appeared on a few times on The Salt-N-Pepa Show but have yet to make any sort of appearance – or be referred to at all – on Let’s Talk About Pep. Joumana Kidd also has three children with her ex-husband, but they are also missing in action. Dating as a single mother is a situation many women find themselves in over the course of their lives, and it would be interesting for the women on Let’s Talk About Pep to confront that issue head on.

However, for what it is, Let’s Talk About Pep is a fun, dishy show that isn’t quite a substitute for Girlfriends, but still entertaining enough to host viewing parties. It’s exactly as Pep sings in the opening to the show: Hot chicks in New York City/Single and high siddity.

And considering all the horrible PR single black women have been receiving lately, it’s nice to have a break.

rebekah says:

February 8, 2010 at 2:51 am

LOVE this show

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Jo-Ann says:

February 8, 2010 at 3:11 am

this show embodies black women in all lights and I LOVE IT!!!

Ahmad says:

February 8, 2010 at 9:24 am

I love Salt n’ Pepa and have watched this show from time to time. Seeing a group that is still working together after so many years is cool. I hope the cast doesn’t become a stereotypical catfight show , like Housewives of Atlanta…

EDubb says:

February 8, 2010 at 11:21 am

I also like this show. But I think it’s a good idea that the ones with children haven’t included them in the show. This is obviously an adult program primarily focusing on the dating lives of these four women. They’re just having fun. Most of the dates don’t lead anywhere anyway, so the “children factor” really doesn’t come into play. I would be more concerned if the ladies WERE introducing their kids to each one of these dudes. I think that it’s safe to assume that these are grown women who know how to handle dating with kids.

Cee says:

February 8, 2010 at 2:01 pm

Agreed. I think this show strictly focuses on the dating/love life of each of these women.
Kamika says:

February 9, 2010 at 11:57 am

I second this!
Blkmarilyn says:

February 11, 2010 at 6:12 pm

I agree. Their kids do not need to be shown in this VERY ADULT show. What bothers me is if this was a show comprised of men there would be no talk about where the children are. It is such a double standard that a woman dating is being irresponsible by not having their children with them on every date. But a man, the idea of children or the mention of children would not even come up. It is such a double standard.

The Style and Beauty Doctor says:

February 8, 2010 at 11:59 am

Agreeing with EDubb about the children. But since it’s only been 4 episodes, perhaps they’ll make some mention or appearance.

a/n says:

February 8, 2010 at 3:29 pm

this is funny! the toesucker guy needs to go! lol

JD says:

February 8, 2010 at 6:03 pm

Im seriously still bothered by the girls nose job, but nonetheless, the show rocks!

CheekyCheeka says:

February 11, 2010 at 6:06 pm

What does their nose jobs have to do with anything. Does their surgery make them any less intelligent, funny, charismatic or beautiful. I mean really we as women/black women need to stick together and stop putting each other down. The show is a hit and they are all successful women. STOP HATING!

Aura says:

February 8, 2010 at 7:12 pm

OH MY GOSH! My new “comfort’” show to curl up and watch! THESE LADIES ARE HILARIOUS!! See..I love that Vh1 picked this up because this is more of an adequate portrayal of what different type of black women go through on the dating scene. Yes..whatever..there are times when good men seem scarce but going through the journey is HILARIOUS! Good job Vh1! I was rolling laughing and they reminded me so much of my “roundtable” discussions with my girlfriends! I think me and Jacque were separated at birth lol..

luvs it!

Stacye says:

February 8, 2010 at 8:17 pm

I must be the only person who does not like this show. :(

Its like a black knock off of Sex in the City. I know the ladies would like to get their piece of the reality show ‘pie,’ but its just not appealing to my taste.

Kristin says:

February 9, 2010 at 9:05 am

I agree. It’s way too contrived for my taste. I suppose my expectations were not that everyone would date so easily as all of these women are doing. I just can’t connect with the show.
keke says:

February 9, 2010 at 1:28 pm

I agree. I really cannot watch the show. All reality shows are scripted but yes, this one is very contrived. I think it goes too far in trying to categorize women into four different characters. It may have worked for sex and the city but that was an obvious fictional story; “Pep” wants to convince us that this show is real and I’m not buying it.

Furthermore, just because a show does not show black women in the desperate, I can’t find a good man light doesn’t mean that it sheds new light or its liberating. Yes, I will give it credit for showing women having fun while dating….but that is all that it is. It doesn’t challenge the viewer in any way.
Nneoma says:

February 10, 2010 at 2:12 am

A black version of Sex in the City? The precise reason behind why I LOVE this show….reality or not.

CoCoChiq says:

February 9, 2010 at 5:12 pm

I love to watch “Let’s Talk about Pep.” It’s a fun show to watch. Actually, the first episode inspired to me make a baby-pact with a very good friend of mine. I think you hit it right on the head when mentioning the fact that Pepa and Joumana’s children are missing in action. I’ve been wondering when they are going to appear in the show or even mentioned. Being a single mother and dating is a very hot topic that should be discussed on this show.

Solgar says:

February 9, 2010 at 9:09 pm

All I have to ask is what does this do for Afrikan people as a whole far into the future. NOTHING (actually do a lot more harm than it ever could good) !?

Zia says:

February 9, 2010 at 10:34 pm

Please stop! LOL. Every piece is not about the future of “Afrikans”! Please go to another site..lol.

shadensummer says:

February 10, 2010 at 3:11 am

the show is OOOOOK… i’m wondering who the HELL is doing PEPs weave though (gotta replace whoever it is) LOL… Kitty is hillarious, Jacque is sometimes too conservative, and Joumana is a sly-way SLUT, so yeah an AA version of S.I.T.C. and truth be told I don’t think half of us could hold out for 4YRS like PEP claims she has-:)

NYCOTGirl says:

February 10, 2010 at 6:43 pm

nah they wont start cat-fighting because they are too busy having fun on this show! Im a hip-hop head and a HUGE Salt n Pepa fan! So happy to see Salt, Pep and Spin all grown up and doin the damn thing! :-) Read Pep’s book-she has overcome so much and deserves happiness (like all of us)! And all 4 ladies LOOK GREAT!

NJ208 says:

February 10, 2010 at 8:41 pm

LOVE THIS SHOW!!!!
While I understand the point about why the kids are not shown – this show is not about them at all, it’s about what it’s like to be older and dating -period. Yes the kids exist, but there is no reason for kids to be introduced with respect to the show unless there is a true committed relationship happening. Further, just because at least two of these ladies are Mom’s doesn’t mean they can’t get their sexy on and have a day/night out with their friends after they have taken care of the responsibilities at home. We women have the ability to walk/talk and chew gum at the same time. When its about the kids and home, it’s about the kids and home, but when it’s about us as individuals and girlfriends, then let that have its place to shine on its own as well.

Ateya says:

February 11, 2010 at 5:11 pm

I love it..but its seems like next week is Pep & Kitty Drama…come on ladies…

Alexandra says:

February 12, 2010 at 11:53 pm

This show is alright. I watch it for laughs & mostly for Jacque.
But I see absolutely no comparison with Sex & the city. I don’t know why people call it the “black” version.
I just wish Jacque would stop talking about her biological clock all the time.

hmmmm.... says:

February 13, 2010 at 1:03 pm

I saw the toe sucker episode…and
I do not care for this show, it’s tacky and over the top…

I really liked the Salt n Pepa show.

Lynette says:

February 14, 2010 at 2:42 pm

Luv this show! Keep doing yo’ thang ladies!

YB says:

February 15, 2010 at 9:16 pm

It’s better than Fantasias show…

Evanique says:

February 16, 2010 at 12:19 am

Ok this is the black version of SEX IN THE CITY If anyone has any doubts look at the players:

Pep=Carrie
Kittie=Samatha
Jacque=Miranda
Joumana=Charlotte

With that said the show has grown on me and I really like it. As for the comment about what does this do for the African Cause as a whole who cares. These women are not degrading themselves and the show is meant to entertain. We need not to take it so seriously!

Mischa says:

February 21, 2010 at 1:19 pm

Waiting to Exhale came before Sex in the City!!!

Waiting to Exhale was created in 1995 – - Sex in the City 1998 !!!!

So who inspired who?

… and yes, I am down with dating and marring an Asian man … why not?

Stephanie from Maryland says:

February 17, 2010 at 5:29 pm

The show IS ENTERTAINING…at the end of the day they want VIEWERS and THAT is the measure of its SUCCESS.
One of the things I LOVE SEEING is how they ALL GET ALONG. Realistically everyone has a disagreement even with a best friend…or family member.

GLAD to see a VARIETY of personalities and thought processes on the same issue (men).
I am GLAD they are NOT ALL loud mouthed, hootchie, ghetto, and sleeping around with anyone who is willing. THAT would be right up there with the usual media portrayals of black women.

But I DO have some reservations about ALL OF THEM not having REAL LOVE…
NOT ONE OF THEM! Hmmm….Why can’t at least on of them scrape up half a man?

Nah…the show is far more interesting with each of them every week SCOUTING for men…LOOKING high and low…WHY? Cause THAT is what black women do…right? Hopefully ONE OF THEM out of the group will find SOMEONE…and then the journey would be well worth it. (smiling)

Introducing their BABIES to the mix would make the show far more REAL…but it is reality tv… Oh! NEVER MIND. With or without the chillren the show is FUN to watch. There is time for them to be acknowledged and to find a proper place in the show.

I will continue to WATCH…and HOPE.

iradoh says:

February 23, 2010 at 5:00 pm

I LOVE THIS SHOW……….PRODUCERS PLEASE PLEASE MAKE IT AN HOUR LONG…

Natakue says:

March 1, 2010 at 10:38 pm

I started watching this show after I read about it on Clutch. I wasn’t sure I’d like it but I gave it a shot, and I’m glad I did. It’s my new guilty pleasure! This show has me cracking up every week. I have more in common with Jacque in terms of personality and being a little more conservative, but I am enjoying all the ladies’ stories! It’s definitely entertaining.

In a recent episode, Pep spoke to her daughter about going on an overnight trip. They’re not trying to hide the fact that they have children. I believe that they’re trying to be responsible and have the children involved only when it’s serious enough to warrant it.

Ok, now I’m going to go finish watching this episode I dvr’d =)

Shiree McCarver says:

March 2, 2010 at 9:36 pm

I love this show being a celebate 45 year old woman myself, I can relate to PEP. Sometimes a woman need to self reflect, especially if you were in a realtionship where you gave your all and it still didn’t work out.
Consiously you know you just can’t sleep with everyone you date. I mean you can, but should you? It’s not for me personally. I have never wanted a host of lovers before finding the one for me and it’s too easy to mistake desire and sexual impulses for love and fidelity. However when you’re celebate, it becomes easier to seperate the two.
This show also shows what works for one woman as far as relationships and dating is concern does not work for others and there are no two women alike. Funny how alot of the guys look familiar though…*lol*

All in all I think, contrary to what society beleives, not everyone wants to be married either. Some of us have been there and done that and the older a woman becomes the more independence and being in control of all aspects of our lives is an important part of our mentality. I suppose it has to do with feeling your mortality as you age.

I dissagree about bringing the children more into the equasion. I think shooting a reality tv show is too much of a disruption in their day to day. It shows responsible parenting on the part of these ladies to limit their children in participating and in the real world in allowing every man you meet or date to interact with your most precious possessions. Also, I think if a grown person signs up to have cams following them 24/7 it shouldn’t be imposed upon their children who are going through growing pains and everything else without cameras forever documenting it.

Ree