Feature

M.B.A. (Married But Available): The New Degree in Dating

Monday Dec 15, 2008 – By Rashana Hooks

Ironically, statistics indicate money is the number one cause of failed marriages yet it also seems to be one of the reasons why couples opt to stay together. With today’s high cost of living, childcare, high taxes and expensive healthcare, remaining legally married with two incomes seems to be more financially beneficial than emotionally satisfying. Choosing pain over poverty has forced troubled couples to resolve their emotional bankruptcy by returning to the school of singles, and declaring their MBA (Married But Available) status with a specialization in fun and freedom.

Ignoring all ethical reasoning, these MBA’s have attracted plenty of applicants to their new school of dating. However, in knowing that everyone is not eligible and emotionally stable to handle such a challenging workload, in order to gain entrance into their program you must first go through a grueling interview process and pass their G.M.A.T. (Guys/Gals Married and Taken) exam to insure you are qualified and prepared for the difficult curriculum ahead. To prepare you for the limited quality time, cell phone only communication and second place status they encourage applicants to give up at least six months of their lives to study for the exam and take practice dates with them. Usually by the time the applicant discovers that an MBA is not for them the semester is over yet they’ve already paid their tuition. And since tuition reimbursement, financial aid and scholarship funding is limited for MBA’s, you are forced to accept their “loan” and deal with the payment consequences thereafter. Whether you decide to attend full-time or part-time the expense will be costly and could leave you both broke and unhappy.

This new dating craze is more common than we would like to admit. No longer is the single scene filled with unattached men and women looking for a good time and potential spouses. They are now all occupied by attached spouses just looking for a good time. Regardless of its nature or course, this new degree of dating has proven to cause more setbacks than advancement in marriages resulting in the disrespect of its intended institution. Choosing to live the single life while benefiting from the perks of marriage is not only greedy but ungodly and it only proves that just because its’ cheaper to keep him or her doesn’t mean you should spend your savings on anybody else.

chichi says:

December 15, 2008 at 7:38 am

wow, its weird I personally wouldn’t opt to giving another money and receiving money just to be finacially stable but also be apart of a fraud marriage. life is definetly everchanging.

↑ Reply

Da Fookynator says:

December 15, 2008 at 8:19 am

Good story, although a fact or two showing that this is actually something thats is widespread would be good.

I dont think there is anything wrong with two adults deciding it makes financial sense to stay in a marriage and get emotional fulfillment elsewhere. There is definitly nothing “ungodly” about it. Just ask Creflo Dollar.

donna says:

December 15, 2008 at 9:05 am

WOW are you serious Da Fookynator or are you clowing on Creflo who is largely considered a false teacher within Christianity. Or should I say biblically IS a false teacher.

Ummm yeah it is ungodly as the whole point of marriage is to be a reflection of Christ’s marriage to the church. The problem isn’t within the spouse but not having proper connect with God. Because He has the ability to either fix that which is broken, or make the willing mate able to live with the other mate, although the connect isn’t the same. Fulfillment coming from Him not Man (and that’s mankind not calling out males:):))

Tyra D. says:

December 15, 2008 at 9:45 am

This story saddens me. Just thinking about the emotional ambiguity of this situation makes my heart heavy.

Pam says:

December 15, 2008 at 10:02 pm

MBA was my major on and off between 1991 and the present, and I failed every semester….. Karma is a bitch so I changed my major to loving myself 101….

Alicia/InstantVintage says:

December 16, 2008 at 5:22 pm

This is why I laugh when people talk about the “sanctity of marriage.” Seriously.

b- says:

December 17, 2008 at 4:13 pm

As an English teacher I feel the need to point out that the word “then” is used incorrectly in your article (which I think was interesting and very accurate). The proper term would be than; th-a-n. For example, “…proven to cause more setbacks ‘than’ advancements…”
I truly enjoyed your article, as I do most on clutchmag. In the society we live, it is almost illogical to leave a stable and secure marriage in search of some ‘pie-in-the-sky’ emotional quick-fix. Emotions are so shallow and they change constantly. The stability of a marriage is smart. Quick fixes are sometimes necessary. Yes, it’s sad.

Clutch says:

December 17, 2008 at 4:26 pm

Thanks B! We have fixed the error. Thanks again:)

Get Togetha says:

December 17, 2008 at 11:30 pm

Pam.

I love your comment. That is all.

Nicole Foxx says:

December 18, 2008 at 10:32 am

Far too many people feel this way about marriage. Society and Hollywood has encouraged this way of thinking and unfortunately, the church hasn’t promoted much teaching on marriage and its purpose. Often times people marry for reason’s that are not scriptural and find themselves in similar situations. Marriage has to be a mindset of oneness with the husband/wife. Essentially, people need to be knowledgeable about the commitment of marriage, before making that commitment. There is a requirement for genuineness and long- suffering. Our answers to how to be a married women or man are in the Word.

Skinny Black Girl says:

December 18, 2008 at 12:20 pm

Allow me to be a bit unorthodox.

There are two tenets of marriage. There is the legal side and the spiritual side. So the broadly held view that marriage can only be defined on spiritual terms is to me, inaccurate. The legal aspect of marriage is a contract. And just like any contract, the terms are negotiated by and at the discretion of the two parties entering said contract. More than likely, the terms are going to be a compromise of what is most advantageous for the two parties.

In that sense, people can get married for whatever reasons they choose. I understand the widely accepted Christian view of marriage, however everyone who seeks to marry is not Christian, or even religious for that matter. Now, for those who have chosen a lifestyle governed by religious principles, then yes, their marriages should fall in line with those values. But it is unfair to discredit those who have chosen alternative paths and lifestyles based upon their own beliefs/needs.

Rashana says:

December 18, 2008 at 5:45 pm

I’m glad I got everyone thinking, agreeing, disagreeing and laughing! This is real life for many….

Oh and thanks for catching that error B

Ms. Beans says:

December 18, 2008 at 9:59 pm

No one is being discredited for living alternative lifestyle. The person who wrote this article is stating her/his opinion on “open door” marriages. i agree with the person. I do not believe in marriages just for financial reasons. It is only my opinion. I believe marriage is a sacred thing.Just between two people who love each other and YES not everyone follows mankind view on marriage and live their life the way the world lives it.

Seek the truth for yourself

Mike says:

December 20, 2008 at 4:14 pm

Sounds like a twisted version of a swingers party to me.

TT says:

January 14, 2009 at 3:33 pm

This article is right on time for a conversation that my girlfriends and I were having. My personal philosophy is SMO single men only. And I prefer to keep it that way.

SO TRUE! says:

March 24, 2009 at 11:57 pm

LOL – I know too many guys like this. This mess is real.