“Black man bashing” haha. Anytime a woman expresses a viewpoint that doesn’t properly stroke a Black man’s ego, she is “bashing”.

Whatev.

And the fact that by “dating out” one ASSUMES they MUST only be talking about WHITE MEN is another thing that boggles the mind. It’s not all about Black and White, there are a multitude of other races FYI. Might wanna keep that in mind…

It’s also disturbing that Joe has SUCH vitriol for women “dating out” but says of Black men (who do it in much larger numbers): “Black men basically do it without solicitation. There was no agenda or movement needed for it.”

Really???? The scores of athletes and other high income Black men who EXCLUSIVELY “date out” aren’t part of a movement to shun Black women as romantic interests? That doesn’t qualify as “an agenda”?

Ugh please. Joe your argument would hold more water if you condemned everyone equally for this “dating out” phenomenon and the promotion of it (because men DO promote it amongst themselves and follow through with it on a MUCH larger scale than Black women), rather than being solidly out to vilify any Black woman who tells others to explore universal dating options.

Also, I could care less what “earnings” figures you post that show Black men out earn Black women by a measly $5000. That isn’t a true measurement of social capital-education, professional advancement (which cannot always be measured by income alone) or other factors that influence one’s social capital.

Sometimes it’s not about hating black men, but about not being personally interested in any men in the first place…

Let me extrapolate on my response. I have two sisters. One is a Lawyer, and the Other is in Law School. I am very protective of them, and I hate this constant defeatist attitude being perpetrated by a lot of Black women today. Its a constant passing of the buck which was never allowed in my household. That irks me to no end.

What gets me the most is this exploitation of Black women under the guise of Black Female Empowerment. Its a huge farce, and extremely self-serving. Black men have issues, Black women have issues, everybody has issues. We all acknowledge this. But when people try to talk about it. The only solution black women ever seem to come up with is “date a white guy”. Its beyond idiotic, and people wonder why the Black community is not progressing.

——————————————————-
“And so what, if you perceive that a black woman hates black men, in the larger picture of life, what does it take away from you personally. Another person can only do to you, no more or no less than what you allow. Why is this so much under your skin?”

I have always had an issue with dishonesty. Its a personal character flaw. Even you are barely admitting that some black women just hate Black men for no other reason than they are Black men. Some black women will invent 1001 reasons to hide the fact that they are for a lack of a better word. Bigots. Oh, they will call black men color struck, or self-hating. But pretend that black women could never be exactly the same way. That is what gets under my skin.

Why can’t some of these Black women just own up to their own internal hatred of Black people.

Trust me. I don’t take this beyond my work place. I can easily separate cyberspace from reality. But that is what bothers me.

I have sisters that is what it has to do with me. If you have a problem with that. Then don’t read what I have to post.

I have an opinion and I share it.

Just to clarify-I was in no way suggesting that you believe that black women expect others to do our work or address our concerns. I thought you raised some good points and I just wanted to expound on my feelings of black women and the relationship to feminism and black men.

ok, i’m finished posting comments back to back!!! :-)

thank you for asking that question! i would like to read JoeBmore’s response

@ JoeBmore,

There are a few ideas with divestment that suggests that black women should ignore and detach themselves some of the perils of the poorer neighborhoods where many black people still reside. Now I feel that ppl have a right to there opinion but at the same time, I cannot detach myself from the poorest of the poor communities since that is a part of my personal history. However, I do believe that there is only so much that I can do.

As I stated before, I do believe that it is important for black women to consider themselves, their personal well being and not put everyone else’s needs before their own. There are many litmus tests that are imposed on black women, we have been told that those tests define what it means to be a “real black woman”. I do not subscribe to that ideology. I am not going to keep myself down, broke, miserable and unhappy for folks that do not want to pull their own weight and I will not do all of the work for anyone. Having said that, I do believe in education and learning important tools that will enable me to navigate through the world successfully. I also believe in bringing that knowledge back to ppl who are less informed but with the condition that those individuals will put in work and make important/necessary changes to improve personal lifestyle.

As far as dating, I personally have never dated outside of my race. I have considered it as a possibility because I don’t believe that I MUST spend the rest of my life with a black man. I do strive to live a happy life and if that involves being with a man of another race, so be it.

@ thewayoftheid,

you certainly raised an important issue and very important facts. I would like to say that given the history in the country, black women are indeed the mothers of feminism. We just don’t always get the credit. When it comes to the discussion of men; I think that there are some distinctions.

There are some problems that black men face in this country and I am not blind to that. I am supportive in the advancement of black men. However, I still believe that there are issues solely related to black women. Those conversations should not revolve around black men. I do not male bash and I don’t think the answer is to leave black men in the dust. I believe that it is just fine for black women to focus on ourselves. As you alluded to in your comment, we have been constantly been told to “wait our turn”. If we don’t turn up the heat and make our voices be heard, our concerns will not be adequately addressed.

I do not expect black men or white women to do the walking for us, there are some things we must do for ourselves. If other groups would like to come aboard, that is fine, but they must be just as invested in our interests as we have been in their interests throughout the years.

Also? PLEASE put the Beyonce down. Shaking ass and writing grade school lyrics does not a feminist make.

And Clutch? The next time you wanna tackle this topic, it might help if you get a writer who actually KNOWS the subject.