With Valentines Day fast approaching, many are probably wondering if the one they’ve been spending quality time with wants to do more than just “kick it” and instead try to lock it down and really begin building toward the future.
Perhaps you’ve been dating the perfect man (or woman) for a few months now. He calls you every day just to hear your voice, sends you cute “I’m just thinking about you” text messages, and when you two are together you have the most wonderful time in the world. Just when you’re about to change your Facebook status from “single” to “in a relationship” you stop yourself and ask, “What’s really going on?”
Since the simple days of middle school love notes that once asked, “Will you be my girlfriend? Check yes or no,” are no more, many of us are left to wonder if we are or are not actually in a relationship.
Sure you can assume that the person you’ve been seeing is your man, but assuming so can be dangerous and may possibly lead to a messy situation rather than a happily ever after. Just ask Nina and Darius.
Although the best course of action is to always talk honestly about what each of you wants and expects…the real question becomes when?
How soon should you delve into “The Talk” with the person you feel has the potential to be the one?
The timing of “The Talk” can make all the difference in the world. If you’re totally feeling the person after a few weeks it may be too soon to have “The Talk” or you could do more to scare off a potential mate than show them that you’re serious. However, if you play it cool and wait for them to broach the subject first, you may leave yourself open to remaining indefinitely in relationship limbo (and perhaps even being just another team player on someone’s overcrowded roster).
Knowing when to have “The Talk” is not only tough, but it can also be very scary. Speaking openly and honestly about your feelings and being completely vulnerable is a frightening prospect, but in order to have the relationship you want sometimes you just have to take a chance.