In a recent interview with Essence.com, model Jessica White spoke about her romantic dealings with men in the past and how it’s clouded her judgment. White, who has been linked with some of Hollywood’s hottest bachelors such as Sean Penn, footballer Terrell Owens, Kerry Rhodes, and even Usher says she’s now celibate.

She says:

I made a vow to God last year, after so many letdowns and the relationship with my ex, and I knew I really didn’t want to continue making the same mistakes anymore. So I started questioning myself and thought about what I could do to improve me. I reached a place of spirituality where I felt I really needed to concentrate on my relationship with God and preserve myself.

Women nowadays, we connect physically too soon without actually getting to know the person. If you don’t actually give this person your body and then they let you down, there really isn’t a great disappointment; not like it would be if you have already connected physically. I started going on that journey, and I thought to myself, you know what, the next man that I give my body to will be the man that God brought into my life.

I never said that I’m going to wait until marriage. I said it would be a man that I actually know is going to put a ring on my finger. It’s just about me connecting with God and God confirming that this is the man he has created for me. I’m a realist about it. People took that out of context. I said the next man that I sleep with hopefully will be my husband. That’s what I said and I meant that.

I’m in love with somebody now and I don’t connect with them physically. Who knows if it’s going to go to marriage? We have to get over the physical aspect, you know? A lot of people fall in love because you’re sharing your body with someone. And sometimes you get it twisted and you think that that’s real love.

While her aims are admirable, I always feel some type of way when people make generalizations about the behaviors of women. Although I’m sure some women sleep with men before they are able to emotionally handle it, plenty of others do not.

Moreover, imposing artificial rules such as not waiting for marriage, but until you’ll know that hopefully he’ll put a ring on it, as White suggests, still sounds a little strange. But hey, if she’s likes it, then I love it.

What do you think Clutchettes? Do women tend to give it up too soon?

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  • Honey

    My body is a temple so I shall treat it as sacred. I have only one body.
    If you tkink before opening your legs you will avoid getting pregnant or a sexual transmitted disease. Keep yourself busy with work and knowledge. If you feeling like getting it you can read a Zane / erotic book.

    • AlmondJoy

      OR you can masturbate. LOL…

  • Kim

    I definitely respect her a lot more.

    I wish more women would have enough self awareness to come to this realization. It would save some people a lot of heartbreak and bitterness. Men will usually “disagree” with this opinion for obvious reasons, but 1) its about doing what is best for you and 2) truth is they don’t disagree at all, they know deep down they don’t want to be with a woman who has had a lot of partners or one who is carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Its a smart move all around. Jessica White just went up in my book.

  • MoonGirl

    I agree with her. I recently came to the conclusion that taking sex out of the equation definitely has heightened my judgment when it comes to matters of the heart. And I figure any man that has a problem with waiting clearly is incompatible with who I am. Sex is GREAT! But in my opinion it’s better when you are completely trusting of your partner. And trust take time.

    Also, it’s nice to see someone in the spotlight saying something like this for the younger girls to hear.

  • fahrealtho

    Women treat their bodies as if it’s a free for all. We worry that if we don’t do it he wont like us. Truth be told, you Don’t have to kiss a bunch of frogs to get your prince. The prince will still be your prince whether you give it up or not. Truth be told if you have sex with each man you date quickly and it doesn’t work out it’s then on to the next one. And the more we have sex with; the more we have “demons” “skeletons” or secrets in our closets that can rare it’s ugly head during an actual relationship. You are with Daryl, but Tyrone had a bigger ___ or knew how to work it better. So you spend time thinking about what Tyrone did right while Daryl does everything else right. Men can be trained to be great lovers, and every man with a lot of notches on his bedpost is not the bomb lover. It takes QUALITY over QUANTITY for both us and them.

    A lot of our young women are coming up thinking that vaginal and oral sex are no longer the norm. You have to go farther and be more adventurous in order to keep a man, to the detriment of our health, emotions and mental well being. A guy said to me once that a girl he dated was a prude; she didn’t want to do anal or swallow. SO… she is giving him oral and lots of vaginal sex but THAT”S NOT ENOUGH!!!!! I shudder to think of the boundaries that are being crossed all in the name of having a “man”. Meanwhile the male population is not forced to cross any lines they deem unnecessary. Only we have to be contortionists, porn stars and freaks to keep a man who MAY NOT STAY ANYWAY. Oh and worse yet, women are STILL not getting orgasms!!!!! I have had 18 sexual partners but ONLY ONE gave me and continues to give me orgasms. That means 17 of those situations were BS. Every guy i slept with got theirs (save for one, he was truly annoying me and I pretended to be hurting so he never actually got his, thank goodness for that).

    I say hold out ladies. As long as you can. Stay in neutral non sexual territory as long as possible. Avoid sex talk. Keep a vibrator on deck just in case.

  • Dolce Diva

    In all honesty, if I feel like I want to have sex with a guy a couple days after I met him, so be it. I’m not gonna feel guilty or feel as if I wasted my time because I wanted to do it. I focus more on the quality than the quantity. I don’t implement the 90 day rule. Who really sits there and counts up to 90 and says, “Okay! now I can f***?” I don’t jump into bed with every guy. If I feel comfortable and the mood is right and I don’t feel this man is a bum-bitch-loser, then I’m going in. And if all it was sex, then there is more fish in the sea. I know my worth and I know what I deserve and I know what I like. I have standards. I don’t think about it being too soon. I live in the moment.