Earlier today, one of our favorite Philly girls, Jill Scott, had Twitter buzzing when she asked her followers if they’d ever consider being in an open relationship. The singer—whose latest album has been my summer dating soundtrack—admitted that she has been giving it some thought.

Jill tweeted:

“What do you think about “open relationships? Been considering.

Many friends are making it work. Not sure if I’m that girl but not sure if I’m not. Sometimes there’s an understanding that nobody else gets.

I’m certain of what I want and deserve. Still so many marriages fail. Worth the questions. Worth the thought. For some it’s a turn on.”

After some pushback from her fans, Jill posed another question. How would you handle it if your partner cheated?

“Ok. Try This, the love of your life cheats and is honest about it. Your life with him/her is everything you want but monogamous. Do you stay?” she asked.

After a fan warned that those seeking open relationships should just “stay single” and not look to cheat, Jill said, while she isn’t looking to cheat, she’s “not trippin on it either.”

Apparently some of Jill’s fans weren’t the only ones who weren’t feeling the “open relationship” discussion. Former TLC member, Chili, tweeted to Illy Jilly:

“I’m about to call you cuz you can’t be in nobody’s OPEN relationships!! Talk about a horrible situation!!! So answer your phone!!”

Chili also insisted that women who are involved in open relationships are merely doing so to “please their wack ass boyfriend!”

While I’m sure some women who find themselves in open relationships do so because they want to please their mate, others do not. The thought of women being comfortable and in charge of her sexuality has scared some, so it’s no wonder that many aren’t able to understand why a woman would want to “share” her partner or herself with others while still maintaining a relationship.

Even though open relationships may not be my thing, I don’t knock or judge others for their choices. Everything isn’t always about “keeping a man,” sometimes it’s about a woman enjoying herself and getting hers.


But what about you Clutchettes and Gents…could you have an open relationship? 

Let’s talk about it!



*Hat tip to Necole Bitchie.

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  • Bridget

    No, I haven’t been in an open relationship–knowingly. I’m too jealous to be in one,too. But if that’s your thing–go for it.

  • Rastaman

    Admittedly dealing with my one woman is enough for me but that is because I was never good at the multiple people relationships, it takes a makeup I lack. I however see nothing wrong with whatever 2 or more consenting adults are willing to engage in. Different people have different needs and some of those needs may not necessarily fit into what most others expect. But then living your life to make other people happy will generally end with you being unhappy. As long as people are honest and upfront about their needs and their behavior then I am not worried

    Some people find open relationships threatening even if they have no desire to be in one. They worry that if such arrangements become more common than their spouse or significant other may opt for that lifestyle. There are many women whose primary fear in relationship is been abandoned by their SO thus adding another woman or the option of another woman to that equation increases that fear dramatically. It is understandable; we have been socialized for centuries to monetize monogamy.

    But I would think maintaining an open relationship requires much stronger mentality than most of us have. We may think we can deal until we have to deal.

  • Guest

    and wth @Jill Scott. Chick is hurting bad and needs counsel.

  • ChoCho75

    Hmmm, let’s see…HELL NO!!! I love Jilll Scott’s music, but she’s going through some things thinking about this mess! That’s a good way to have MS burning!!!

  • Open2Open

    I am in a healthy monogamous relationship with room to grow, I am a female and have initiated the convo on polygamous relationships. We are very communicative and do so much together and we grow together. I am not here to add to the already heated discussion just to add another perspective check out a couple who seems to have a very good handle (at least on the outside we never know on the inside) on open relationships: http://www.jujumama.com/