There is a negative connotation associated with so-called “gold digging,” and in my opinion, unnecessarily so.
Is there anything really wrong with financial security being a pre-qualifier for your potential mate? Why is it wrong for your mate to be able to afford the finer things in the life (whatever the finer things in life may constitute for you)? I mean really, of all the wretched, repugnant, morally unscrupulous things to be in this world, why is being a “gold digger” looked upon as an ignoble characteristic?
Kanye West reignited the controversy about gold digging in his 2005 song aptly titled Gold Digger. He rapped, “If you f**king with this girl then you better be paid… You know why, it takes too much to touch he.“ Ye finishes by saying, “I don’t care what none of ya’ll say, I still love her.” Back in the day, several songs paid homage to the practice. In the 1935 Opera Porgy and Bess, the lead character soothed her child with these reassuring lyrics, “Summertime and the living is easy…Your daddy is rich and your mama’s good lookin’, so hush now baby don’t you cry.” Jamie Foxx endorsed the practice on his Foxxhole radio program saying, “There is nothing wrong with a fine woman wanting a rich man. “ Even Barbara Walters, chimed in on the subject with a quote that I like to subscribe to: “Mingle with the rich and marry for love.”
The fact is there is a very specific skill set that “gold digging” women possess, that is no less meaningful than someone else’s ability to type 75 words per minute, or crunch numbers all day, or have a 7 range pitch, or write a grant, or commandeer a battalion for that matter. It takes an immense amount of talent to be skilled at this practice. Successful gold diggers must be charming, stunning, savvy, good in bed, strategic, have the ability to make a man feel good about himself by dangling on his arm and assuaging his ego. And let’s be real, it’s not as easy as it looks, so why should you not be compensated for your proficiencies?
A problematic misnomer about gold diggers is that they have no ambition or are lazy. People often claim they are not intelligent or ‘have their own.’ But this is not entirely true. There are many women who subscribe to this way of being because they are of a certain economic status themselves and consider it ass backwards to be in a relationship with a partner that brings less to the table.
The beautiful actress Lisa Raye, self-proclaimed “platinum digger,” is one example. She was famously quoted as saying, “People think that I’m a gold digger. I’m digging for platinum. I can’t do nothing with a Burger King man unless he own about 20 or 30 of them.” Classist much? Perhaps, but is there anything wrong with wanting to be provided for?
For what it’s worth gold diggers get a bad rap from men and women alike. Often times I wonder when men participate in gold digger bashing do they specifically do so to dupe a woman into believing that she should sleep with him with absolutely no strings attached. But, if a woman falls into the line of thinking of not expecting anything from a potential mate, or a man they want to bed, then expectations will be held low and there is rarely any upward mobility in a relationship once you have settled in this way. But other women give professional gold diggers a hard time as well, often labeling her a slut, whore, or any number of derogatory terms designed to insult women of ill repute. But really? Come now. Everybody is screwing, and just because one decides to screw men of a certain economic standing does not automatically qualify one as whore. If anything, gold diggers are women who know what they want and are smart enough to get it.
My philosophy on this subject is this: if you’re going to dig it may as well be for some treasure! Don’t knock the hustle.
What are your thoughts? Is gold digging immoral or a valued skill set? Please chime in.