“When you’re doing well in life, it’s par for the course certain individuals will try and knock you down,” former Family Matters star Jaleel White said in a recent statement about the very public claims made by his ex-girlfriend Bridget Hary that he was physically and verbally abusive during the course of their relationship.

Although only White and Hary know what actually happened, it’s certainly not an unfamiliar story. Almost inevitably, your ex-boo hurt you and before you know it, they’ve moved on, not only with their love life, but they seem to be succeeding in every other aspect of life as well. And it just seems so unfair.

I never realized that Karma doesn’t always work when you want her too until I had my first real heartbreak in high school. Back then, I learned that she has her own schedule.

When I was a freshman, I had the biggest crush on the same guy for three months and it was no secret amongst my group of small girlfriends, which is why I was shocked when I spotted one of them holding his hand at lunch over chicken fingers and fries. I cringed at the sight, ran out of the cafeteria and vented to my other friends that she was officially out of the circle.  She had done the unthinkable, and surely karma would come her way, right?

But it didn’t. My ex-friend went on to be my crush’s girlfriend for over a year, she succeeded in her academics and sports and had a great time doing it all. The worse part about it is that although she did later apologize to me, there was nothing genuine about her regret. I don’t think she was ever really sorry or cared about my feelings one bit. She only said it to make herself feel better. Either way I was hurt by the entire thing and said a silent prayer that she would learn her lesson even if I never got a front row seat to witness the payback.

Although that was a long time ago and I’d forgotten all about it, recently an old high school friend brought it all back up, telling me that my ex-bestie had married early, but was in the middle of an ugly divorce. And while I didn’t get any joy from the news of her heartbreak (it was high school after all)–or feel anything at all for that matter—I wondered if her situation was karma rearing its head.

Whether it’s the married man that cheats on his wife with seemingly no consequences, the parent who abandons their child, the backstabber at work, or the man or woman who broke your heart so bad that you’re convinced you’ll never be in love again, don’t seek revenge, wish them harm or even get mad at their supposed successes.

Bid them adieu, let go of the pain they caused you, and move on.

In the end, the Universe never forgets, and your big sister Karma will be waiting.

Someone once said, “don’t seek revenge on the people who did you wrong, God can take care of them far better than you can.”

And I certainly agree with that.

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