#trending

Dear Evelyn:

I’m glad to see you’re recovering nicely from the altercation with Chad. It would be a shame for those stitches not to have healed up fast enough for your media blitz. I’m sure no woman wants to do a paid interview while having a bruised forehead. Yes, I understand that you were abused. But did you also know that every 15 seconds a woman somewhere in America is battered by her partner? Also, do you realize that the wheels of your media blitz are bound to fall off eventually?

Lets talk about warning signs. You said in your recent People magazine interview that you “knew that look in his eyes,” and you knew when to back down. If you’ve seen that look before, why didn’t you leave, maybe after the first or second look. Plenty of women don’t get to have those warning signs. Even before that warning sign, you knew of his past domestic violence charge. Let me guess, you were the type of woman who probably thought the woman provoked that incident? Why? Because Chad told you so?

Your face is everywhere. People know your story. People also know that you’re a batterer as well. It doesn’t matter if it’s a man or woman. You’ve battered people. If only those people took to the airwaves just as you did. Woman on woman violence. You’re the queen of it. I’m sure by now you’ve promised that you’ve changed. Just like most men promise that they’ll change as well.

I would hope as much time you’ve spent doing paid interviews, you’ve also volunteered at a few battered women shelters. Wait. What’s that you say? They don’t pay for appearances? Oh. My bad. In any event, personally, I’m tired of hearing your story. As a woman who has volunteered at battered women shelters for about the past 6 years, I’ve learned the real strong type move in silence, but of course these women aren’t being vetted for tv and magazine interviews. The women I’ve worked with don’t get paid for media appearances. They don’t get fitted for high-priced dresses, and have their makeup done before they step into a photo shoot. These women typically put in hard work to support others like them because they realize the common connection they all share.

Therapy. Get you some. It may prove worthwhile for you. I hope the amount of time you’ve spent going back and forth doing these media appearances, there’s been some counseling sessions in between. Being a battered woman isn’t easy to deal with. No matter how much makeup you put on, no matter how much you spend on your shoes, you’re now a statistic.

No, I’m not letting Chad off the hook if that’s what you’re thinking. See, he showed the type of person he was when he was charged with domestic violence in college. It’s safe to say, Chad has some issues as well. I mean, you did say he gave you that “look.” I’ll just call it that “I’ll headbutt you” look. I wonder if it’s the same look that a dog gives a person right before they take a plunge to bite them. Usually when people see that look, their first instinct is to run. Unfortunately, Chad played up to your insecurities — we all know you have them because no woman would attack another woman the way you have if they didn’t — and he knew how not to make you run. That’s what abusers do.

Please, no more interviews. Use your time wisely to educate other women about domestic violence, off-screen. Fix yourself. Fix your life. Bravo for extending your 15 minutes of fame, but as you’re extending it, remember, every 15 seconds a woman is battered. Do your part in helping those who need it.

Tags:
Like Us On Facebook Follow Us On Twitter
  • Serika

    What in Oxymoron hell is this article. She can’t talk about her situation to educate folks but she can if she does it away from the camera?? I have NEVER in my life heard a DV advocate say such things. You don’t get to silence her and neither do any of the other 82 people on here. Get a fucking clue reality TV is fucking scripted. You know that and I know that the producers set these violent situations up and they indulge to get paid. That does NOT mean her husband can go upside her head. Clutch is just awful for allowing this mess on their website. It’s hypocritcy at it’s finest.

    • Nehemiah53

      So I guess you beleive her crap just because she is a women.

    • Serika

      No I belive her because he admitted to doing it , the end. He has apologized, told his followers not to blame her and is currently working out a plea deal with the DA.
      Again this is tasteless for Clutch, I am shocked you have NO standards and have resulted to blaming the victim because you don’t like the character she plays on an obviously scripted reality TV show

  • This has got to be one of the worst reflections from a supposed anti-DV advocate I’ve ever read. You’re seriously asking “why didn’t you leave?” Textbook victim-blaming. Unbelievable.