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There was this one time I dated a Republican. I actually didn’t realize he was a Republican until after I did some research and found his writings on a right wing website. During the span of about 5 months, we never discussed politics. Although we discussed religion, I never assumed just because he was Catholic, that Catholicism and his political views aligned. I took my best friend as an example. Raised Catholic, but clearly a Democrat. There were times when subjects such as abortion and women’s rights came up, and he had strong views against it, but that still doesn’t make a person a Republican. After I discovered his political writings online, I sent him an email and said, “Oh…interesting views.” His reply was a simple, “Yes, I think they are as well.” That night we planned a dinner as usual and never approached the subject again. Eventually he relocated, but we still keep in constant contact with each other.

There are several notable people that don’t share the same politics as their significant other. For example, former California governor, Arnold Schwarzenegger is Republican, but his estranged wife, Maria Shriver, is a Democrat. Not only is Mariaa Democrat, but I tend to refer to her as a“super” Democrat, because of her Kennedy bloodline.  Then there’s political strategists Mary Matalin and James Carville. Carville is a staunch democrat, and ran Bill Clinton’s 1992 Presidential election. His wife, Mary, a Republican, ran the first Bush’s failed reelection. Both are seen occasionally debating each other on CNN and other news outlets. In an interview with CNN’s John King, the question was raised, how do they live in a household with such opposing views:

King: Our viewers have watched throughout the year. And so you come in here exclusively with us. And they often ask, “How can these two disagree so much and get along?”

And so we asked people to text in a question for James and Mary. And here’s what we got from Indiana:

“Love you both. Can you show both houses of Congress your secret for compromise?”

Matalin: Well, we’re not a democracy. We’re an enlightened MOM-archy. That’s what we are. [Cross talk.]

Carville: I don’t — it’s nothing if — as long as one person is not arguing, there’s nothing to argue about. I don’t have a — [Laughter.]

Carville: I don’t have a position on anything domestically. So I just say yes, and then go on and do it. I mean it. I would say the three ingredients to successful marriage is surrender, capitulation and retreat.  If you’ve got those three things —  [Laughter.]

Matalin: Spoken like a true liberal. What a martyr. Faith, family and good wine. That’s how we do it.

The fact that two political heavy hitters like Matalin and Carville are living harmoniously with different political affiliations shows me that, it not so much your political affiliation that matters, but if you’re able to disagree amicably about issues, and not bring them to the bedroom.

Does political affiliations play a role in your dating or marriage?

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  • jamesfrmphilly

    who you will do IS a political decision!

  • Nikki79

    My boyfriend is African American and is a strong republican. He has done work with Black Republicans and the Republican Party in our community. I am also African American and a strong democrat. I am very active in the political world due to my career and the space I am in leans very strongly to the liberal/democratic side. In 2008 we went to the polls together and he voted for McCain and I voted for Obama. I have no problem with him having his political views. We talk politics all the time. We watch the conventions, political shows, and political debates. We agree to disagree on many things. We both have an open mind and respect our differences in opinion. I don’t think my boyfriend could be who he is if he were to change his political views. He wouldn’t be the same man because it does influence many of his own personal beliefs and values. I enjoy it. Keeps me on my toes. I think it makes our relationship more dynamic.

    • Val

      I’m curious, Nikki, to know what your boyfriend thinks of the racism in the Republican Party? And what you think of it in terms of him being a Republican.

    • lol

      me too

    • jamesfrmphilly

      he cannot think and be black and be a republican

  • No it does not- I am very conservative, my boyfriend is liberal leaning. It makes for good conversation.

  • The Mighty Quinn

    To align yourself with a party, you are aligning yourself with their ideals, their vision of the future. I could not ever be or be involved with a republican. Even friends that are liberal republicans (oxymoron) bother me because ultimately you are voting against women, for keeping the rich, rich and the poor, poor and want to mix church and state. I am against all of those things. When you look at both the RNC and the DNC, the DNC audience represented the America I want to live in, multi-cultural, multi-lingual and above all multi-racial. The RNC audience represented NONE of that.

  • Rosey

    I’d date a Republican. If anything happened, I’d still go get an abortion over their objection.