Remember when Fantasia was accused of being a “home wrecking ho” (not my words, but her accuser’s)? Her then boyfriend’s wife, Paula Cook, attempted to sue her for carrying on an adulterous affair with her husband Antwaun Cook, before they were separated. See, in North Carolina there’s alienation of affection or criminal conversation lawsuits, which allows a spouse to sue their lover. Back then, Paula’s claims were that they weren’t separated before Antwaun started sexing Fanny, so she decided to sue. Unfortunately, Paula Cook lost her lawsuit. Apparently Antwaun was telling the truth about his separation date. The court ruled that the actual date was was Sept. 14, 2009 and not June 2010, as Paula had claimed.

Fantasia isn’t the only person who’s being sued for such activities. Over the past couple of years, particularly in North Carolina there has been a rise in these cases. More than likely because of a $9 million award entered in Guilford County against Anne Lundquist, a woman who had an affair with Allan Shackelford, the husband of Cynthia Shackelford.

I’m never one to call someone a “homewrecker”, be it a man or woman, but people need to be aware of the laws of the states they live in, before they decide to do the sexy all over someone else’s spouse. Besides North Carolina, Hawaii, Illinois, Mississippi, New Mexico, South Dakota, and Utah are the only other states that still open the door for “homewrecker” to be slapped with a lawsuit.

Now don’t think you can go out and willy nilly sue the boyfriend or girlfriend of your spouse. In order to prove alienation of affection, there are a few elements that have to be present first. You have to prove that you and your spouse were happily married and had genuine love and affection for each other. This is where all of those love-dovey Facebook status updates could come into play. Screenshots. You also have to prove that the defendant destroyed and alienated the love and affection of your marriage, and that it was the defendant’s conduct that caused the destruction of love and affection. On the other hand, criminal conversation is a lot easier to prove. The only thing need is to prove that you were married and not separated and the defendant had sex with your spouse. In my opinion, it takes two to tango. While you’re suing the paramour, go ahead, divorce the spouse and make them joint defendants. Pretty simple concept, if you ask me.

Would you sue the person your spouse was having an affair with?

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  • mamareese

    Ok, I agree with the whole Karma thing. But if his income impacts your home and a divorce will decrease that income…..I’d sue both if I could because if this jumpoff thang didn’t pop off your home may still be intact. So if it’s to keep my home intact as far as bills and morgage somebodies getting served and let GOD handle the rest….Whoo glory (Aunt Esther LOL).

    • lucci

      Just a lil tidbit but if a jumpoff, if thats how you see it, comes along or not a broken home is a broken home and the problem is not with the jumpoff its with the 2people in the marriage living in the same home and choose not to solve their issues. Another woman or man cant break whats already broken!!!!

  • shadow

    Really, I thougt I had a yes or no answer for this question, but now, aftering some pondering I would honestly have to be in the situation to know what I would do…interesting though.

  • Rue

    more of a waiting to exhale Angela Basset kinda gal

    • Finally, a fellow woman after my own heart…LOL but yeah I wouldn’t sue because it just doesn’t seem worth it in the end. You may have the money but your significant other still cheated on you and broke your home and no amount of money can fix that. And as mention, I don’t like this law because it still seems that the woman (not trying to generalize but I’ am willing to bet that it would be more women suing other women for “homewrecking” than men) is bearing the blunt of the blame (not excusing her actions) and not the husband unless the wife is planning on getting a divorce and take him for what he is worth. But if she is still staying with the him then where is his punishment? Because let’s be realistic most people don’t solely pack their bags due to infidelity alone, I think this is a slippery slope. Who knows what the spouse maybe telling the “other person” people lie every day to people about the status of their relationships, I can see if the person KNEW the other person was married and acted without regard anyway but even then I see that as a moral (and serious character flaw) issue not a legal one. The only time I can see this law working if the unknowning spouse gotten an STD from her spouse that cheated that affected her health. But to use this to deter behavior not so much…