There’s a good reason people make bucket lists. It’s because despite our strong desires to conquer the world and achieve a laundry list of goals, life happens and often times those happenings get in the way of us pursuing what we really want. For most of us that means things like not zip lining through the Costa Rican jungle or becoming fluent in French. For Tyra Banks it means not having kids.
In an interview with People, the woman who wrote the book on modelpreneurship was very candid about her fertility struggles and the missed opportunity to have children the good old fashioned way. She told the mag:
“When I turned 40, the one thing I was not happy about is that I did not have kids. I’m like, ‘Damn, the clock is ticking! Since I was 24, I used to say every year, ‘I will have kids in three years.’ I kept saying it over and over again. Because my business is very entrepreneurial. I’m not for hire, so I have to do everything. I kept trying to find that time for that to happen.”
Tyra didn’t actually find that time until 41 and, unfortunately, after undergoing IVF procedures she’s finding that time is not on her side.
“When you’re like, ‘OK, I’m just going to do it,’ then it’s not so easy as you get older. I’ve had some not happy moments with that, very traumatic moments. It’s difficult as you get older. It’s not something that can just happen.”
Though Tyra is still hopefully she can have “a litter” of kids, science tells us she’ll be lucky to have one. Should she conceive, it’s likely many women will use her tale of hope as assurance they can keep ignoring the ticking of their own biological clock. But the better lesson might be to think about the principle of making time for things you truly want.
At first Tyra’s comments sounded weird to me. Every woman knows there will come a day when she can no longer birth a child — that’s just not something you forget — but what some of us, particularly career women, do forget is having a baby isn’t like sitting down to write a book or start a business or buy a home. There are a lot of variables that don’t follow a standard procedure like putting together a business plan or applying for a loan. If you want to go the traditional route, you first need to make time to find a partner to reproduce with, and beyond that you need to discuss fertility plans with your physician long before you get to what should be the fun part of making a baby. For some reason, making a 3-to-5-year plan for our finances or our entrepreneurial endeavors becomes second nature, but taking the time to at least explore reproductive options before we run out of them often doesn’t cross our mind. Does that mean you don’t want children as badly as you think or is the issue an underestimation of the probability that your body might betray you when you finally find the time to bring a new life into this world?
Clutchettes, do you worry about finding time to have kids, either now or down the line?
Image Credits: Getty Images